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42
Kaya’s POV.
I’ve wondered and wonder even more what the future holds for me. Every time that I get hurt by these bastards, I think it’s the worst that could ever happen to me until a much more hurtful event occurs.
Raising my gaze, my insides burst into another fragment of tears, rushing to the outside, and I can’t control it.
I’m hiccuping; my nostrils are wet and running with mucus. I can’t even bring myself to clean it off. Talk about my face?
It’s all wet from tears. They’d dry, and I’d hiccup for some time before, again, I would start crying.
I wish I could just die, but no, these bastards want me to suffer. And, coming to think of it, what did I ever do to them? What was my offense?
That’s what pains me more. What did I do? What was my offense? Did I ever hurt any of them? Or is this some curse that is bestowed on me that I must continuously get punished by these bastards?
I wish they could rot in hell. I wish they could get crushed within the wind, and I’d never have to see them again, not ever, not anymore.
Aiden’s body is still wrapped in between my hands, as I can’t bring myself to let go of him. I feel like if I do, that’s when I’ll realize that we can’t ever have a discussion again. I can’t see him blink his eyes, scratch his head, tease me, bring me food, take me to luxurious rooms, pick up some apples for me, or make me an apple cider.NôvelDrama.Org holds text © rights.
I begin to recall all that he’s done for me. Every morning, he would be the first person that I’d see, sneaking me to one of the best rooms in the palace, where we’d both have our baths-differently, of course, but it was magical. And then he would go to the royal kitchen to steal some fancy food for us.
I’ve never had such a friend before. I’ve never seen such a person call a brother before, but he made me. A part of me was with him, and now that he’s dead, that part dies with him.
I’m in remorse and regret and unable to forgive myself.
“I’m supposed to protect you.” I stutter in between my words, unable to complete the sentences well. “I… I should have been a better sister. I should have been a better friend. I should have known that we ought not to go to that forest. I felt the negativity. I should have known better. I was stupid. I… Oh, goodness. What can I even say?” I look away, towards the rail bar, and stare at it for the longest time possible.
I don’t know how many times I’ve zoned out, imagining the times when he was still alive, when we were happy, and even when I knew it could come to an end, I never could have foreseen this.
I didn’t think this could be possible.
“I’m so sorry. I swear on my life. I’m so sorry. I swear on everything…” But he can’t hear me. There’s no way he can decide if he will forgive me or not.
I don’t even need him to forgive me because I failed him.
For the next few minutes of my life, I battle with my courage to take a look. Finally, I am able to, and taking a look at his lifeless face, another barrel of tears pours out of my eyes.
My vision goes blurry entirely, and my mouth widens as they curve downward, an awful sound being released by my throat. I am wailing and shrieking out my pain.
After a while, I force myself to stand up. No, I need to do whatever I can to give his body some comfort, so I tear a part of my gown and spread it on the opposite side of the dungeon.
Then, I walk back to where his body is-unmoving, stagnant, and lifeless. The more I think of the fact that he’s gone forever, with an emphasis on forever, the more I find myself weakening from the inside.
But then, I have to do this. Stepping into his pool of blood, I manage with all my strength to carry him into my arms and bring him to the other side, placing him on the torn fabric.
I just want to believe that it would be better if he was put in a cleaner place, even though every part of the ground is messy and irritating to the skin.
Throughout the night, I sit next to him, holding his hands, unable to even close my eyes for more than a tick of a second. Staring at his body, I find myself smiling a saddened smile as I wish he was in a better place now, far better where none of these wolves can hurt him and where he is free. I wish that. I want that for him. And I hope nature will grant him that.
It is morning, and my body hurts from being in one position throughout. My face feels hard when I shift to readjust, and at the same time, my back hurts so bad.
However, the pain from Aiden’s death rips deeper than any body ache right now. My tears have dried, causing my face to feel like some brick, and because I have been in the same position all night, my limbs are wobble when I sit up appropriately.
I am still next to Aiden’s body when the gate crackles at the metal hinges being unlocked. My face is emotionless as a guard walks in, his eyes fixated on me.
I’m tired of fighting against it or wishing that he would see my pain. To him, I deserve it all, even when I haven’t done anything to hurt him or even his masters. Irritation reels all over his face, evident like the morning sunlight.
“Stand up, slave.”
I will not do as he says, and I don’t care whatever happens next.
He takes a step closer and smacks my face, forcing my lips to cut and spurt out blood. The spot hurts, burning like hell, but I force myself to remain emotionless, not giving him the satisfaction he wants.
He’s about to hit me again when the other guard says, “Leave her, dude. She’s worthless anyway. Let’s just take her to Master Kade. He’d punish her appropriately.”
“Right.” After he speaks, he grabs me by my hair to pull me up. That’s when I scream outwardly, unable to keep the pain within, and I am forced to stand upright, my legs rooting into the ground.
It doesn’t take him any stress to push me along the path, dragging me by my hair and causing the strands at the back of my neck to stand as I whine in pain, but it doesn’t stop until we get to the dining room.
The door opens, and he kicks me inside. Raising my face, my sight comes into contact with the brothers. They are seated comfortably on their respective chairs, eating breakfast with such peace in their eyes as though they deserve even a hint of it.
No, they deserve pain, and that’s all I wish I could give them, but I’m powerless. Also, I’m too weak to even fight them. I feel too weak from the inside. My anger is the only thing that fuels my strength, and seeing them right now in this situation that they ought not be in, I suddenly want to kill them all in the most painful way possible.
Kade stands up and smiles softly, his eyes unshifting from the eye contact we maintain. “Good morning, Kaya.”
My jaw twitches as my lips press into a hard line. The nerves at my neck are poking out, streaming down my skin, and my eyes are narrowing at each of them. Rancor courses through my senses.