Laura’s POV 102
I stumbled and ran out of The Lynch Family with only one thought in my head, I can’t let Cameron take Sunny!
If Sunny was taken by him, then I was bound to follow him, but what was I doing following him? As my mom said, he and I are brother and sister, that’s a fact that can never be changed, no matter where we go this is a shadow. And Sunny will live in the shadow of the world for the rest of his life.
I couldn’t think too much, as soon as I got home I simply packed my bags and prepared to take Sunny away before Cameron took her away.
In fact, I’ve always wanted to leave this place, and I’ve long thought about the arrangements I’ll make after I leave. I would take Sunny to Hallstatt first, which is far away from Jerez State and is in the southwestern mountains, with a pleasant view. Although the economy is not too developed, the pace of life is on the slow side, and people are contented, so it’s a good place to recuperate.
More importantly, no one would recognize us there, so I could bring Sunny to live there in seclusion and live a quiet life.
Cameron didn’t come home for a few days, and I was a little puzzled and more than a little lost. But the matter of leaving Jerez State was imminent, and I had to steel myself to deal with everything. Instead of trains and airplanes, I quietly booked boat tickets and was much less likely to be spotted going by water.
However on the very day I left with the kids, Cameron showed up at the docks.
First a few men in black suits and sunglasses rushed over and snatched Sunny from me, I screamed for help, but the staff on the pier did nothing, many people gathered around to watch, just not one person came to my aid.
I had a bad feeling in my heart.
Immediately after two people set me up, do not know where to take me.
I panicked, Sunny cried her heart out. The ship had already sounded its horn and gradually pulled away from the pier. A tall figure appeared in my line of sight, black trench coat, indifferent look, between the eyebrows as if there is a knot that can never be unraveled, the eyes are sharper than ice cream.
He lit a cigarette, the smoke ring faded with the sea breeze, my heart immediately sank to the bottom.
His men carried Sunny to him. The child, who had been wailing just a moment ago, immediately stopped crying as soon as she was in his hands, looked at him with big tearful eyes, and in a short while, hooked her small hands around his neck.
Cameron held Sunny in his arms to comfort him, the bottom of his eyes dense with rare tenderness.
“Give me the child …” I rushed forward, and before I could get close, I was stopped by a few of his men.
“Cameron, give me back my child!”
Sunny in his arms to my side looking, small age she did not know what happened, eyes all panic, waving little hands shouting “mom, mom!”
“Sunny, be good.” Cameron said softly, “Daddy protects you, won’t let you suffer any wrongdoing.”
The little girl understands and stops crying immediately, but still looks at me and Cameron at a loss for words.
“Cameron …,” my heart was so broken that I almost fell to my knees and begged him, “Please give Sunny back to me, I can’t live without her!”
“Where do you want to take her?” He looked grim, “You’re going to sneak her away from me?”
“We can’t be together.”
“It doesn’t matter if it’s with you or not.” He sneers, “But Sunny has my blood in her, my daughter, and she has to be with me!”
I didn’t say anything, Cameron continued expressionlessly, “Now I’ll give you two choices, first, obediently bring your child back to me. But think clearly, I’m not doing this because I have feelings for you, it’s entirely for the sake of the child. The child is still young and needs its own mother by its side to take care of it, so I’m reluctantly keeping you.”
“What about the second option?” My throat tightened.
“Second,” his gaze was cold and sharp, “leave the child and get yourself out!”
“No way!” I screamed, “Cameron, I carried Sunny to term! You have no idea how hard it was! The day I gave birth to her I had a difficult labor and almost lost my life … I took a knife to the stomach and cut her out! And you know how hard it is to raise a child? I haven’t had a full night’s sleep in the past two years, especially when she was less than a year old I had to get up several times a day in the middle of the night …”
“Cameron I’m begging you … you can’t just take Sunny away from me like this!”
“Then be a good boy and stay!” He yelled, “Why are you sneaking around and taking the baby away? Is Sunny just your daughter alone? She’s my daughter too!”
“You’re my brother, we can’t be together … I beg you, just let me take Sunny away! If you miss her come and see her, I won’t stop you!”
“Stop it.” He looked at me coldly, “Laura, then you choose the second path. In the future, Sunny will be taken care of by me, and you will leave by yourself! This child from now on … has nothing to do with you!”
“Don’t!”
At that time, it was as if I had stepped on the air, and behind me was a bottomless abyss. I don’t know where the strength came from, broke away from his men and violently rushed towards Cameron. I was going to get my baby back, it was my daughter and no one was going to be able to separate us!
“You’re crazy!” Cameron shielded his child with one hand and blocked me with the other, turning his face to the men and shouting, “What are you waiting for? Stop her!”
I yelled like a madman, not knowing whose back of the hand I bit or whose face I scratched. Those few people, taking into account my relationship with Cameron, didn’t dare to really make a move against me. The pier was in chaos, and all that could be heard was my very loud crying.
Cameron holding Sunny to the sidewalk, I went crazy and chased after it, grabbed Sunny has been small feet to pull her to my arms. Sunny cried loudly, Cameron will not let go, in the scramble I slipped on the bottom of my feet, a wave of inertia pushed me out of the … I body crooked, fell directly into the sea.
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When I woke up again, my mind was in a daze.
I had a headache and had no idea what had happened. Lying in this hospital room, the tip of my nose was full of the smell of disinfectant. The man sitting next to me looked at me with concern, “Laura, how are you feeling?”
But I couldn’t remember who he was.
For a long time afterward, I was in this state of amnesia. The past had a hazy outline in my head, but I couldn’t recall it at all.
“Don’t force yourself if you can’t remember.” The man told me, “Get your body well before … you have a high fever for a week and fluid in your lungs, it’s hard to heal for a while.”
“Fluid in the lungs?” I looked at him.
“Yes.” He said, “You fell into the ocean and hit your head on the reef.”
“How did you fall into the ocean?”
He is silent for a moment without answering. Smiling at me when he raised his eyes again, “Let me introduce myself, my name is Patrick, you used to call me Brother Patrick.”
Patrick, Big Brother Patrick …
I smiled at him, I vaguely remembered the name. I remembered how nice he was to me once upon a time, when we had been dating for about a month, he had arranged a big heart with flowers right under the building where I worked.
It’s strange, I obviously do remember some things.
But the doctor concluded that I had lost part of my memory.
“I do have a lot of things I can’t remember,” I told the doctor honestly, “like I don’t know how I fell into the ocean, like … there seems to be a blank space in my head, but Brother Patrick can’t fill in that blank space.”
“I think you are selectively forgetting.” The doctor said, “That blank space may be the very thing that spurred you to forget. Because someone or something caused you a lot of damage, your brain chose to forget after being shaken by the strong stimulus. This is one of the body’s self-protection mechanisms. There have been quite a few research topics about the brain, and mankind has not been able to fully decipher the secrets of the brain so far, even if I were a doctor, I wouldn’t dare to jump to conclusions.”
“But …” he smiled, “since the ones you forget are bad and the memories you leave behind are good, it means that your subconscious mind wants to live well. Just accept what God has in store for you!”
I nodded, he had a point, but that void always made me panic.
“Doctor,” I asked, “is there any possibility of me getting my memory back?”
“There is a precedent for that.” He explained, “Perhaps over time, your memory will slowly return, or you may receive an external stimulus and have it return instantly. As for exactly how, it’s really hard to say!”
I went back to the hospital room and Patrick had already packed all my things and was ready to take me out of the hospital.
“Thanks.” I smiled lightly at him.
“You’re welcome.” He patted me on the shoulder, “Any more discomfort?”
I shook my head.
I look at him and he smiles a gentle smile, like sunlight spilling into a hospital room. A man like that can be counted on, right? But why wasn’t I with him in the first place?
“Something you want to ask me?” His gaze probes.
I hesitate and whisper my concerns. “Why did we split up in the first place? I remember you being very nice to me …”
“Don’t think about the past.” He smiles, “I’ll still be good to you in the future.”
“Will you marry me then?”
He paused, “That’s not necessarily true, I think you might not want to marry me.”
“Why on earth? You’re very nice, I have no reason to turn you down. Now that I’m in this state, you’re still the one taking care of me.”
“Laura,” he sighed softly, “maybe I’m not the right guy for you. You said yourself that there’s a void in your head, but it’s a void I can’t fill, and I’m self-aware of that.”
“Who does that blank space really belong to?” I bit my lip and looked at him without looking away, cold sweat seeping down my spine.
Patrick was silent for a long time, the emotions in his eyes changing in a million different ways, and finally his eyes darkened, gray disappointment falling over them.
“Don’t think about it.” Was all he finally gave me.
Don’t think about it …
I was lost, a heart falling from a great height but nothing to catch it. Trying to explore the truth but never finding the path.
“Haven’t you always wanted to go to Hallstatt?” He asked me.
“Yes.” Despite the memory loss, the place Hallstatt was still clearly etched in my mind. For some reason, I’ve always wanted to go there.
“I’ll take you.”
Patrick said firmly, and my heart shook with the thought of leaving this part of Jerez State.
Hallstatt was far enough away from Jerez State to require a plane ride, and a bus ride of several hours after the plane landed to get there. It is located in the highland mountainous area, my body is weak, I did not escape the plateau reaction, coupled with all the way to travel, sitting on the bus is like sitting on a bumpy boat, dizziness, stomach turning over a hard to vomit.
Patrick took good care of me, even if I spit acid all over him, he didn’t half mind.
“I’m so sorry …,” I managed to squeeze the words out of my mouth.
“Never mind.” Patrick wrapped his big hand around my shoulder, letting me lean into his arms, “Get some sleep. Hang in there a little longer, there’s not long left.”
“Brother Patrick …,” I couldn’t sleep and wanted to talk to him for a while, “Where are we going to stay when we get there?”
“I’ve arranged it, in a neighborhood in the city center. There are two houses for rent, one for you and one for me, we’ll live across the street.”
“I thought you were going to live with me.”
“Am I the kind of guy who takes advantage of a fire?” He laughed.
“Laura, I actually have my work.” He said, “Coming to Hallstatt was an assignment for the police force, and I applied for those two apartments with the force.”
“What kind of assignment do you have?”
He didn’t say so explicitly, just laughed softly, “It’s a work secret, can’t reveal it to you, but I’m definitely going to be stationed here for a while, maybe three or five years.”
“Which means I’ll be here alone in three or five years?”
He blinked, the emotion in his eyes unreadable to me.
“Not necessarily.” He said softly. “Oh yeah, and I’ve asked about your job for you, as a teacher at a private kindergarten, would you like that?”
“Of course I’m willing!”
“It’s better to take care of the older kids.”
“Thank you Brother Patrick,” I was a little embarrassed, “You’ve arranged it so thoughtfully, how can I repay you!”
Patrick looked at me with a look that seemed to carve me into his mind. He smiled and hugged me a little tighter, I felt his lips gently pointing at my hair, his voice seemed to come from afar, “You do well, you must do well … is the best repayment for me.”
In this way I went to Hallstatt with Patrick, and after everything settled down, life was on track. I was happy with my job, the older children were lovely and obedient, and I didn’t have to work too hard. It’s just that Patrick’s job is a bit hard, he’s on a mission every day, leaving early and coming home late.
Sometimes when I hear his door slam, I rush to bring him a bowl of soup from the kitchen. This is a small tacit understanding between us, I would stew the soup early every day and wait for him. We were less like lovers and more like family. Maybe that’s why I didn’t choose him at the time.
But that blank space in my mind, who does it really belong to?
I still struggle with this question when I can’t sleep late at night, thinking about it, thinking about it, thinking about it, thinking about it, thinking about it, thinking about it, thinking about it, thinking about it, my head hurts and my heart throbs. I’m surprised, panicked, and yet even more curious.
It was as if that person was deeply rooted in my memory, but now it became invisible.
Was that person the reason I gave up Patrick?
But why, then, had I forgotten everything that belonged to him? What kind of excitement and hurt did he give me?
These questions from time to time tumbled out of the stirring I can not sleep peacefully, however, I never thought that the answer to these questions, will be in half a year later surfaced …