Chapter 16
I have a shower, get dressed, and head down to the dining hall to get some breakfast. Entering the room, I let my nose lead me to the food, grabbing a plate and piling it with every greasy item within reach. Turning toward the seats, I find the whole room silent, everyone staring at me.
‘What?’ I snap angrily, ‘never seen a she wolf eat before? Go back to your own lives.’
Stalking toward an empty table, I throw myself into my seat, glancing around furtively, finding Caden and Hadley both missing. A growl crawls up my throat as I stab my fork viciously into a strip of bacon and shove it in my mouth.
‘Woah, what did that bacon ever do to you?’ Ashleigh’s voice asks as she drops down into the seat next to me.
‘Nothing,’ I grumble, ‘men, on the other hand, they are all assholes.’
My friend laughs, picking up a strip of bacon between her fingers and biting it as she grins toward me. ‘Ahh, so the two mates are having an issue with being friendly with each other’ she muses knowingly.
I snort, ‘they aren’t even being friendly with me, never mind each other’ I huff in annoyance.
I can feel Ashleigh’s gaze on me and I turn toward her sulkily, ‘what?’ I demand.
My best friend shrugs as she chews her food, ‘nothing’ she replies after she swallows, ‘it’s just odd that the girl who didn’t agree with mates, or the mate bond, is sitting here upset because her mates aren’t behaving in the way that we have always been told they do.’
I narrow my gaze at my friend, ‘I’m not upset that they are not acting like love sick puppies’ I retort in annoyance. ‘I’m angry that they are treating me with disrespect! I don’t care if any of us actually want to be mated, we are and they shouldn’t be shoving me aside all the time.’
Ashleigh nods, ‘absolutely’ she agrees jovially, ‘they should be talking to you, letting you take care of them when they get hurt, understand that you will be worried about them . .’
‘Exactly’ I mutter, glaring at my egg as if it’s personally offended me, ‘do they know how it feels to see them bleeding? Hadley has cracked ribs, I just know it and he wouldn’t even let me touch him to make sure he was OK! Why? I was just concerned.’
‘I know’ Ashleigh soothes, ‘it’s almost like they don’t understand that you care about them’ she adds, ‘like they are protecting themselves from being hurt.’
I pierce a piece of sausage, swiping it through the egg yolk, ‘well if they would stop shutting me out for five minutes, maybe they’d see I care about them both, see that I love . . . ‘ My mouth slams shut as I raise my gaze to my smirking friend.
‘You what?’ she asks innocently, fluttering her eyelashes at me.Content from NôvelDr(a)ma.Org.
I glare at her, sneaky b*tch, ‘nothing’ I mutter under my breath, chewing on the sausage with a vengeance as my best friend sniggers beside me.
‘I didn’t think so’ Ashleigh replies in a sing song voice, ‘now if you’ll excuse me, my mate is waving at me and indicating to his lap so I think he wants me to feed him.’
Giving me a wave, she saunters off toward Dexter who pushes his chair out to accommodate her, his arm circling her waist as she plops down into his lap, placing her plate beside his and pressing her lips to his in a love filled hello.
I look away, scowling angrily. Nope, I’m not jealous, not at all, I don’t want that, I don’t even want a mate, let alone two fawning over me like I hung the moon. I need to stop letting that woman get into my head, not all of us want this stupid bond.
I finish off my food, pushing back my chair and dumping my plate on the dirty racks before storming my way outside, taking a deep breath of morning air, trying to calm myself. It doesn’t work, I’m still seething, with Hadley for pushing me away, and with Caden for blowing hot and cold with me, the guy is giving me whiplash! I know I’m not what he wanted, I mean he and I have been at loggerheads for years, but that doesn’t mean he gets to treat me like crap.
Curling my hands into fists, I dig my nails into my hands as my lips press into a firm line. I’m done, no more of these two playing with my emotions, I want some damn answers and I want them now.
Growling furiously, my shoes leave prints in the still damp grass as I make my way toward the Carrington home, striding up the stairs and banging on the door before my nerves catch up with me.
Crossing my arms over my chest, I barely have time to take a breath before the door opens and a very tall, very shirtless warrior is stood in front of me. My mouth dries up as my gaze focuses with laser sharp precision on the eight pack in my view. Goddess, he’s really pretty, does he know how pretty he is?
My arms loosen from my chest, as my hand reaches out, halting millimeters from the rock hard pecs and my gaze moves up to the stormy grey eyes watching me.
‘Jamie-Lee’ he rumbles, and damn does my name falling from those lips make my knees weaken.
‘yeah?’ I breathe out, my gaze now focused on those same lips, remembering how they felt pressed against my own.
‘Why are you here?’ his voice calls out from far away as I lean closer to him, breathing in heavily, my eyes shuttering as milk chocolate invades my nose. Wow, he smells really good. I love milk chocolate, I wonder if I lick him will he taste of it?
‘Jamie-Lee?’ there’s that voice again, it’s like honey, I like how it curls around me.
‘Mmm hmm?’ I mumble distractedly, licking my lips, I bet he tastes like chocolate, that sun kissed skin just screams creamy goodness.
‘Why are you here?’ I blink rapidly, snapping my gaze up, frowning slightly as Hadley’s face swims into view, why am I here?
He crosses his arms over that chest again, his muscles rippling, and distracting me again as a tiny voice in my head whispers ‘aren’t you mad at the walking dessert?’
Right! I’m mad! I straighten up, shaking off the l**t, replacing my dreamy look with a scowl as I raise my hand and point a finger at him, jabbing the tip into his abs, OK, they really are as hard as they look, literally nothing gave way . . I bet he could pick me up easily, throw me over his shoulder . . focus Lee! Goddamit!
‘You!’ I snap, glaring at him, ‘you are an a*****e.’
Hadley merely raises an eyebrow at me, leaning against his doorframe as he studies me, ‘is that all?’ he asks.
I blink in surprise before shaking my head, ‘no that’s not all’ I retort, ‘I have something to say to you, you will stop treating me like an inconvenience. If you want out of this mating then just say so, stop stringing it out.’
The warrior’s eyes narrows as he contemplates me, ‘you’d like that wouldn’t you, make it easier if I did it, takes the guilt away.’
I step back, gazing at him in confusion, ‘no I wouldn’t like that’ I stammer, ‘I wanted to get to know you but you obviously don’t want to know me! Look, I know I’m not what most men want as a mate and I’m sorry you got lumbered with me. Trust me, you are not the only one of my mates who wishes he got someone else’ I add under my breath.
‘What?’ Hadley’s sharp tone makes me jump as a hand wraps around my arm and I’m suddenly hauled into the house, the door slamming shut behind me, my back hitting the wood as I’m caged in. ‘What did you say?’ Hadley growled darkly, ‘you think Star doesn’t want you?’
I shrugged, avoiding his gaze, it’s hard to think when he’s surrounding me and all I can sense is his chocolately scent. ‘Neither of you do’ I reply, trying to keep the hurt out of my voice, serves me right really, I didn’t want a mate so the Goddess gives me two and neither of them wants me.
Hadley lifts one of his arms from the door, dragging his fingers through his hair as he curses under his breath. ‘You think we don’t want you’ he mutters to himself.
I straighten up, frowning at his chest, ‘well obviously, you run away every time I’m within twenty feet of you and Caden talks to me like s**t all the time.’ I let out a huff, ‘I thought maybe . . ‘ I shake my head sadly, it doesn’t matter, I’m an i***t.
‘You thought what?’ Hadley growled, grabbing my chin and forcing my gaze to his.
I sigh, ‘I thought maybe Caden might be OK with us being mated’ I mutter, ‘we had a nice time on our date even if he is a bit of a d**k’ I add. ‘Then I went out with you and you were really standoffish but every so often there was like a c***k and I’d think . . ‘I shrugged, my voice trailing off. ‘But it’s stupid, Caden has never liked me and you want me to stay as far away as possible from you.’ I bite down on my l*p, tears pricking the back of my eyes, ‘I should just reject you both and let you find someone to make you happy’ I mutter, the fight leaving me.
‘NO’ Hadley growled, the power in his tone scaring the crap out of me as I shriek. Pushing off the wall, Hadley paces in front of me, gripping his hair in agitation as I watch him. ‘You don’t understand’ he mumbled, yanking so hard I cringe on his behalf.
‘What don’t I understand?’ I ask, trying to bring his attention back to me, anything to stop the anxiety crippling him.
Turning to face me, his chest heaves as he looks at me, pain in his eyes, ‘you don’t understand’ he whispers, ‘it’s not that I don’t want you, it’s self preservation.’